Damn Stressful

Back from Sabah trip=back to reality..

Been forced by family to go Sabah since cheap ticket was purchased last yearr~ RM30 go&return O.O
Missed one week classes..
I felt extremely stressed throughout the whole trip!!
Every night I close my eyes, I could see my classmates looking down on me..
Everyone has handed in their assignments, but I haven't started yet.

The worst moment was I got an anonymous call at midnight.. 囧
I totally forgot who it was, until it started barking like mad-the one who used to tortured me as his hobby. I WAS TIRED, NEAR EXHAUSTED.
Turned off the phone, back to sleep. I seem have made him madder. SMS me with aggressive content.
Sigh... it has been a long time, y he seems have getting more childish?

Whatever, I shouldn't be influenced by him at all~

Everyday 6am morning jog, 7-11pm supervise keep fit programme (i'm vice organizer).
Should I pull out? Will they appreciate me? Am I just an useless "vase" for them?

Lecturers teach till which chapter? When is the deadline? How to do my assignment? What to do?

I'M SO FREAKING STRESSED!!! ;( 

Complicated Feeling

I believe many ppl have blogged about "complicated feeling" stuffs~ x)
I can't think of a suitable title so I just name it like that.. whatever.. I just need a place to release these shitty feelings.

The feeling of being left out
I always wonder why this could happen to me all the time (club activities)! Been asked for catwalk training for 3days. 1st day, they changed location by telling everyone, except me. I found the place by myself T_T
2nd day, Alan asked me out for movie, at first I scared they might NEED me. But since they forgot me, I also want to ffk them, "wait till they call me see how la.." I think. Unfortunately, after I finished watching movie, back to campus, there were no call, no msg, nothing at all. I though they were busy so just ignore me. But the truth is, the training has been CANCELLED again. NO ONE INFORM ME. The 3rd day, I dulan liao. Just dun go dun go dun go. They wan lanci me just go ahead. Mana tau, they cancelled the training again.. N I DUNNO. wtffff

Again, same club, held a gathering night. Since the catwalk training incident, I afraid to attend. I have totally no sense of belonging there.. This time was funny. I didn't attend it. The next day many of them asked whether I could recall any funny moment last night.. "Oh ya u absent that night", then just turn their head to another person who attended...... C'mon!! At least pretend to ask why I was not there laaaaaaa... So hurt leh like that... But I think my decision was right, even I went there I will also be treated like transparent jellyfish.

Where is my friends? We were good hanging together, we were good friends, they used to treat me like their precious gem, we always used to have many topics to chat... ;(

Nah~ fake friends I don't want. I know I am just worthless to them. After finishing "INTI's Biggest Loser" event I will just quit. I know bad rumors about me will then start to spread. Friends bcm hi-bye friends, fake friends bcm strangers. I just need to be prepared to accept all these.

I know there must be a place that fit me. There must be many true friends will find me worthy. =)

From now on, study is my one and only priority.

Say NO to fake friends!